Last Night, I Had a Dream
In the dream, someone told me that Prem Rawat was going to have an event within driving distance of where I lived. This very much inspired me and I began making preparations to go. I got my ticket, but I couldn't find the exact address, so my attempt to use my GPS didn't work and I felt some anxiety.
As I began my journey, I realized I had four people to pick up -- four people who also wanted to attend the event. Me getting a "late start", I felt some crankiness at having to slow down and pick up four more people (running the risk of getting to the event after it began), but I went with it.
When I got to the house of the fourth person to pick up, I was informed that he was upstairs, sleeping. Ouch! Now I was faced with a choice. Do I wait for him to wake up, increasing the risk of missing Prem's event, or do I just make a beeline to the event? I waited a few minutes, impatiently, and then, his mother informed me that he (the sleeping son) decided NOT to see Prem, so I immediately took off, asking the person in the "co-pilot" seat to enter the address of the event into my GPS -- still anxious that we wouldn't find the venue.
Then, out of the blue, much to my surprise, a disembodied voice tells me to make the next left turn, which I do and, VOILA!, there we are at the event! Just like that. I get out of the car and see a whole bunch of happy people making their way to a big building. I fall into step behind them, enter the building, and come to a staircase, where everyone has stopped -- waiting for the event to begin. I am standing at the bottom of the stairs.
At that precise moment in time, I begin sobbing from the depths of my being -- volcanic sobs -- having finally "come to rest" and realizing how much of my life I had been spending "attempting to get there" -- making all kinds of heroic efforts, dealing with all kinds of difficult choices and responsibilities, when all I really wanted to experience was the moment of "having arrived" which I was NOW feeling very deeply -- waiting, on line, at the bottom of the stairs -- the feeling of LETTING GO COMPLETELY... the feeling of BEING IN THE RIGHT PLACE AT THE RIGHT TIME... the feeling that all of the FORCES OF NATURE were not only behind me, but inside me.
That's when the line started moving and I began to feel a massive sense of appreciation and gladness that I WAS NOT LATE, but RIGHT ON TIME, exactly where I needed to be.
When I got to the top of the stairs, instead of there being a collective rush of people trying to get into the hall -- which is what I had been imagining -- we were informed that there had been some delays, that the event would begin in a little while, and that, in the meantime, refreshments would be served to everyone.
Taking a breath, I found my way to a table and sat down with some friends, feeling only gratitude and the deep desire to ENJOY EVERYTHING in my life -- the journey, the waiting, the choices, the not knowing, the chance to be of service, and especially the DEEP FEELING of gratitude I was capable of having no matter what was happening on the outside.
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